Loosing Hearing
The Wheels of Life
About Growing Older
Ten signs you are getting old
Secret to Living to 100 or More
Senior Drivers
A man feared
his wife was not hearing as well as she used to, and he thought she might need a
hearing aid.
Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the
problem.
The doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to
give the doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. "Here's what you do," said
the doctor. "Stand about 40 feet away from her and in a normal conversational
speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so
on until you get a response."
That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den.
He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away. Let's see what happens."
In a normal tone he asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"
No response.
So the husband moves to closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife, and
repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?"
Still no response. Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet
from his wife and asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?"
Again, no response.
So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for
dinner?"
Again, there is no response.
So he walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for dinner?"
(I just love this.)
Earl, for the 5th time, CHICKEN
First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers.
Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way.
I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.
And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
"Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known."
Ten signs you are getting old.
1. When young ladies start opening the door for you at the post office.
2. When younger people start calling you sir.
3. When the mother looks better than the daughter.
4. When enjoying a romantic candle light dinner, you can’t see to eat.
5. When a good b.m. is about as good as sex. (I said about)
6. When you are over weight, but who cares.
7. When you believe anything you wear matches.
8. When you drive slower than the speed limit.
9. When due to all your aches and pains that you are no longer immortal.
10. When you realize life is fragile and you are only put here for God’s purpose.
11. EXTRA – When you try to live each day, realizing there may not be a tomorrow.
By Dewey E. Fox
The secret of Living to 100 was.
have a great set of genes, a great sense of humor, and
the capacity to never give up
working
George Burns 1896-1996
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”
“Wow,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car. It’s hundreds of them!”
“Your supply of brain cells in finally down to manageable size.” Perks of being over 60.